Know Yourself (Extra credit assignment)
As I wrap up my first semester at a university- thousands of miles away from the place that captured 21 years of my life- I reflect on the progress, and setbacks, that I have made.
In the 2 years I anticipated this move, I set myself up to the best of my ability when time moved slower than I wanted it so I became discouraged. I slipped up on my perfect routine.
I just caught myself in a web of depressed uncertainty. Looking back I should have cherished the quality time I had with my family instead of wishing I was somewhere else. At first, those two years felt like forever. But once California became my reality, time started moving very quickly- suddenly I had little to no time to spend with my loved ones. Suddenly I had to compute how to pack up my whole world and move it somewhere else.
I embraced this change with excitement and a little worry as well (okay- more than a little...). For the longest time I received a lot of pushback from even the most supportive ones- Are you sure you want to be that far? How will you afford it? Where will you stay? Have you even visited? What about the earthquakes? I heard Belmont is much closer. But it was actually happening- I silenced the naysayers and bought my plane ticket.
Now I sit here feeling as unprepared as the first day, I have not conquered what I wanted out of California- in fact, I haven't even started. It feels no matter how hard I prepared I wasn't ready for the mental effects a new environment would have on me.
Don't get me wrong- I am not ungrateful or regretful of this opportunity. I'm just stating that not all accomplishments give you much time for reflection. Once you overcome one obstacle, another appears. I worked so hard to get out here but I hadn't yet had this epiphany. Instead of treating the experience as a "level up" in which I keep grinding, I put everything on pause because I was tired and confused.
If all we do in life is chase after the next great thing in fear of mediocracy will we ever have a moment in which we feel truly satisfied?
Yes. We must always strive for constant improvement, but we should learn to compromise. Don't always sacrifice the current moment for your future. Yet, on the flip side we should not sacrifice our future over living in the moment.
The 2017 Word of the year: B A L A N C E
In the 2 years I anticipated this move, I set myself up to the best of my ability when time moved slower than I wanted it so I became discouraged. I slipped up on my perfect routine.
I just caught myself in a web of depressed uncertainty. Looking back I should have cherished the quality time I had with my family instead of wishing I was somewhere else. At first, those two years felt like forever. But once California became my reality, time started moving very quickly- suddenly I had little to no time to spend with my loved ones. Suddenly I had to compute how to pack up my whole world and move it somewhere else.
I embraced this change with excitement and a little worry as well (okay- more than a little...). For the longest time I received a lot of pushback from even the most supportive ones- Are you sure you want to be that far? How will you afford it? Where will you stay? Have you even visited? What about the earthquakes? I heard Belmont is much closer. But it was actually happening- I silenced the naysayers and bought my plane ticket.
Now I sit here feeling as unprepared as the first day, I have not conquered what I wanted out of California- in fact, I haven't even started. It feels no matter how hard I prepared I wasn't ready for the mental effects a new environment would have on me.
Don't get me wrong- I am not ungrateful or regretful of this opportunity. I'm just stating that not all accomplishments give you much time for reflection. Once you overcome one obstacle, another appears. I worked so hard to get out here but I hadn't yet had this epiphany. Instead of treating the experience as a "level up" in which I keep grinding, I put everything on pause because I was tired and confused.
If all we do in life is chase after the next great thing in fear of mediocracy will we ever have a moment in which we feel truly satisfied?
Yes. We must always strive for constant improvement, but we should learn to compromise. Don't always sacrifice the current moment for your future. Yet, on the flip side we should not sacrifice our future over living in the moment.
The 2017 Word of the year: B A L A N C E
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